(Insert my picture here whenever the bloggosphere decides to release it: I've contacted Blogger re this problem! :/ )

This pic says so much more then my run this evening. This past week was extremely difficult for many reasons. Without getting to detailed, a lot has changed in my life over the pats 12 months. Approximately a year ago I was in a failing relationship. I was experiencing panic attacks on a regular basis, my blood pressure was through the roof, and one day I had to go to the ER because I was having the symptoms of a stroke (ended up being an Optical Migraine)

I had to make changes in my life, and they came upon fast. Before I knew it I was in a new living situation, the relationship was over and I had a new job. It was a lot to take on at once, but I had to. Too many things were falling apart in many arenas of my life at once.

Fast forward to now... er, 10 days ago. At that time I was feeling good about myself. Good about this relationship that I am now in. Good about life in general. I hadn't had a panic attack in months and was even weening out of therapy.

Then last week came around and gave me a reality check. The mixed-up and out of control emotions of last week reminded me that although I have come very far, there are still things I need to work on. Things I need to be conscious of. Things I cannot forget.

I am thankful that my emotions have come under control a bit. I am thankful that I have some approaches on how to change a few things in my life. Thankful that I do have caring friends, and a great man whom I think the world of. I am also reminding myself (quite frequently) that some stresses that are in my life right now, will go away in the (not-so-distant) future. There is an end to the little grey cloud over my head and I see the sun.

Back to this picture. This week I had two panic attacks while running at the gym. Luckily I was able to regain composure and reduce my workout to a walk and still burn those calories. This evening I had an *awesome* run. I did not panic, and I pushed myself harder. I feel like I am regaining myself back. I am thankful I have a therapy session this week, but I feel like I am peering out from under the blankets again.

Electric Youth. It was my favorite perfume as a young teenager. I believe I stopped wearing it when I approached High School. I loved hot there was a funky hot pink swirl around the plastic stick in the middle. It smelled sweet, innocent and perky. This is the perfume designed by Debbie (now known as Deborah) Gibson. It was named after one of her later hits...

...anyway. A co-worker just came in and she is wearing perfume today. Smelling her perfume ( I don't know what it is) in conjunction with my own perfume (Glow by J-Lo) I was suddenly reminded of this pink perfume of my youth.